


Rumplestiltskin Gold, Library Cop

by DarcyFarrow



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 14:59:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2816345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarcyFarrow/pseuds/DarcyFarrow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Belle discovers an unexpected perk of being the Dark One's wife.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rumplestiltskin Gold, Library Cop

After a week's honeymoon (too, too short, they both agree, and they'll make up for it soon), Belle returns to her post at the Storybrooke Free Library. Children on their way to school, employees on their way to work, Leroy on his way to the sheriff's office (after he repairs the leaky urinal, he'll lock himself in Cell B–the one with the window, so he can listen to the birds sing–to sleep off last night's bender) and Regina on her way to re-Reginize the mayor's office, all stop to stare open-mouthed as Belle climbs out of the Caddy, trots around to the driver's side, kisses the driver, then waves goodye. Yes, that was Mr. Gold she just smooched; their eyes are not deceiving them; they know that Caddy well, for its appearance at the curb of any residence sends immediate shivers up every spine. And if doubt lingered in any Storybrooker's mind, he or she need only check page two of today's _Mirror_ : "Library Reopens as Mgr. Returns from Honeymoon." And there's a small photo of Belle snuggling with her new hubby. Yes, HIM.

A collective gasp can be heard round the village. Suddenly all transactions stop. School will start late today by unspoken common consent; businesses will delay opening; even routine procedures in the hospital will be postponed. For all of Storybrooke (except the ex-and-future mayor) turns on its collective heel to run home, to root under beds and couches, on top of refrigerators, under piles of dirty laundry dumped in closets, and on the rims of bathtubs, and when the maverick books and DVDs have been wrangled, all of Storybrooke runs to the library, and with heads hung low, they slide their overdue borrowings across the circulation desk and pray, pray, pray Mrs. Gold won't sic her husband on them (Surely the sweet, shy library manager wouldn't set her own personal Godzilla loose on the town. . . errr, would she?).

"I can't believe it," Belle blinks as she sits down at Granny's counter for her lunch break. "Every single item that was checked out before I went on my honeymoon has been returned. Almost every one. All but two."

"Uhm, yeah, about that." Ruby avoids eye contact with her friend as she withdraws the library's copy of _Fifty Shades of Bacon_ from under the counter, carefully wipes it down with a dishtowel, then slides it across the counter. "Uh, it might be a teensy bit late. Your hamburger is on the house today, okay? Just don't tell your husband I was late returning the book. Please?"

"Of course not," Belle reassures her as she bites into a Granny's Deluxe. This marriage thing seems to have side benefits she never anticipated.

As for that one remaining overdue book (Machiavelli's _The Prince_ ), even as Belle enjoys her free lunch, that one blemish is being taken care of.

For Regina jerks to attention as a shadow crosses her office threshold and an ominous voice greets her: "Hello, dearie. I've come to collect on that deal you welshed out on with my wife. So what will it be, Your Majesty? The Cane of Feels or fifteen cents in fines?"

One Year Later

 _American Libraries,_ the American Library Association's magazine, reports that the Free Library of Storybrooke has received the Highsmith Award for Best Small Library in the United States. "ALA President Johanna Dewey says, 'It's an absolutely remarkable achievement. The circulation record is flawless. In twelve months, this library has never had a damaged, lost or late book. I've never seen the like.'"


End file.
